"You're right, I think you're an absolute philistine. I have no idea how I can even be seen in public with someone so uncultured."

He really tries to keep a straight face as he says it, but the bag of frozen peas he's pressing against his eye makes it a little difficult to take anything particularly seriously, and before the sentence is even out, he's laughing, shaking his head.

"Do you want to go to an actual art museum? You're in the right place if you do. Seriously, pick any building around here, and there's at least a sixty percent chance that it's some kind of museum. Do you like classical or modern art? Or both? Or neither? Because no matter what you like, I'm pretty sure we can find a place that'll educate you all about art you won't really understand, but will probably like looking at."

He gestures expansively to the street around them, and then to Central Park, one of the entrances to which is close by. "If we cut through the park, we can go to the Met. Classical sculptures, a bunch of portraits, and the best part is that I've never once been punched or even threatened there."